Living in an age of instant gratification, it may seem easy to stress. Larger demands on time with less emphasis on the well-being of numero uno help create a great deal of anxiety today. Recently, however, I’ve noticed a movement to help relieve these over-worked stress bunnies.

Companies are implementing massage therapy in the workplace to give employees a moment of peace. Universities are offering weekly meditation classes. My part-time job has one “mental health” day built in each semester.

With so many attempts at relaxation, it’s astounding that any real work gets done. We need stress to keep us on our toes, always thinking of something else we could be accomplishing at every instant. So, I have compiled a basic list of ways to bring stress back into your life. There’s no need to thank me. Knowing the service I’m bestowing on you is enough.

1. Wear a Watch

People who wear watches are more likely to check the time every five seconds simply because it’s something to do. Combine this with meetings, appointments, or anything else that requires being somewhere else at a specific time and you will be unable to concentrate because you are so stressed about leaving on time. It is important that what you check is a watch or a nearby clock. Cell phones have alarm capabilities that free their owners from keeping tabs on time so they can continue to occupy themselves until the appointed hour. Amateurs - when will they learn?

2. Do Not, Under Any Circumstances, Take a Break

Hold your bladder until it tries to explode, eat lunch at your desk, do whatever it takes to continue working. Relaxed students find that stepping away from their desk, fifteen minutes for every hour they study, helps them process information they’ve reviewed and clears new space in their brain for the next hour. But that is fifteen minutes of study time they’ll never get back. And he who spends the most time behind the desk wins, right? Working through the night adds the nice touch of sleep deprivation for optimum stress level.

3. No Exercising

Exercise releases endorphins, which make you happy, which makes you less stressed. Sweating out your troubles has obvious health benefits, too, so you have one less thing to stress about. You have my permission to gasp in horror. So, in order to keep that stress mentality going, you must sacrifice the exercise for "stress eating."

This may sound counterproductive, because you are going to the comfort food to stop the stress. But the truth of the matter is that gorging on cake can only help your stress. It may provide a small satisfaction at first, but if you aren’t finished with whatever you are stressed about, you’ll only go back for more cake. Then you’ll feel angry for giving in and guilty for enjoying it. At the peak of your mountain of stress, you will become anxious about fitting into that new dress you bought, thus completing the cycle of stress.

4. Never Say No

After a stressful week of school and/or work, it may be tempting to take a quiet evening to yourself. Reading a book on the couch, taking a bubble bath, ordering from your favorite take-out place, or simply going to bed early are all ways those silly relaxed people recharge. What they don’t tell you is that they are skipping out on life.