Ah, the Sword in the Stone ride. It's a dream, it's a fantasy, it's something that one day, maybe, possibly, just might be a reality. Okay, it'll probably never be a reality. It's not that it shouldn't be a reality, it's just that it probably won't be a reality. I'm a level-headed person, I understand that, but I won't lie to you and tell you that it doesn't upset me just a tad.

Sunday, November 23:

8:00 - 9:00PM

Nature – "The Wolf That Changed America.” Once upon a time, there was a wolf, a big bad wolf. A man tried to kill the wolf, he tried very hard. He failed. Instead, he wrote a story about the wolf that helped create the national park system and the Boy Scouts. The wolf's name was Shemp and the story is true… except for the wolf's name.

9:00 – 10:00PM

Masterpiece Contemporary – "The Unseen Alistair Cooke.” Maybe unseen to you, but I spotted him behind that vase instantly…. instantly. Oh look, now he's behind the chair. Silly Alistair, we can see you when you're moving out in the open, covering your eyes just hides us from you, not vice versa.

10:30 – 11:00PM

Hairworld: The Pursuit of Excellence. Sorry. They've done synchronized swimming and ferrets Pursuit of Excellence shows, and clearly hairworld too, so now it's your turn. Please insert your own ‘actually I’m holding out for Such-and-Such: The Pursuit of Excellence joke here. There are a number of really great choices that I have off the top of my head, but I’m sure I’m missing some outstanding ones; feel free to comment below.

Monday, November 24:

8:00 - 9:00PM

Antiques Roadshow - “Milwaukee (Hour Three).” Wow, Milwaukee. This repeat episode has the show going to the land of beer. I imagine that's what people bring in too, old beer that no one really wants to drink. I promise you people, in at least one of these three episodes beer will come up. Wanna bet?

9:00 – 11:00PM

The Rape of Europa. During Hitler's rule, the German Third Reich deliberately went out and destroyed many a European art treasure. There were a few art historians who stood up to the Nazis. These brave souls heeded the call, they stood up and hid the treasures. Would that they had done that with more people.

Tuesday, November 25:

8:00 - 9:00PM

Nova - “Ocean Animal Emergency." As you know, the water in some parts of the ocean is getting warmer. That means that some of the animals that live in said waters are in trouble. Thank goodness for Dr. Frances Gulland, a San Francisco vet. Gulland has made it her job to save some of these at risk animals in the Pacific.